how fragile
the flesh is
constantly renewing itself
cell by cell
every day
until
one day
the process stops

the mortal coil
unsprung
dissolves slowly
back into
the rich waiting soil
that receives it

i am conscious
of my own fragility
as my mind
knits itself
slowly begins
the healing process
where once
there were two
and now
i am alone

i marvel at
the intricate machinery
of my own body
so delicate
this network of
tendons and muscles
and other fleshy matter
covering
the bones
that support
the whole

yes i go back
to the bones
of who i am
who i want to be
my whole self
unaffected
by the coming
and goings
of others

i am back here
alone
with my bones
as i contemplate
life
and the living of it

i live life every day
i choose life every day
knowing
the earth patiently
waits
to receive
my fragile self
one day.

***

i try
not to grasp
too hard
the tenuous link
but marvel at it
wonder in my eyes
wonder in my heart
at you
and what you do
to me

the things you do
so romantic
in unexpected ways
the very many ways
you please me
enjoy pleasing me
surprising me

your eyes
the way you look at me
your heart
the way you speak to me

you move me
as i drift away
upon this unknown sea
it’s been so long
since i’ve travelled

fragile
how i feel inside
so easily loved
so easily touched
and yet
but yet
how i hold my breath
not wanting
to take this moment
for granted

fragile, i feel
as i lie here
in your arms.

***

i watch the nightlife
the night creatures
my fellow wanderers
and a passing comment
makes me smile

the heart of midnight
beats, ticks on
something in the air
beckons
and i follow

i never know
who or what
will cross my path
or why

there’s no judgment
here
in this pocket
of midnight

everyone has a midnight story
and i love
to watch these stories
unfold

the night crawlers
stroll out beneath
the midnight sky
in search of
midnight pleasures
midnight wonders
midnight secrets
midnight promises

my feet follow
midnight
night after night
wherever midnight
takes
me.

***

let it carry me away

let it carry me away
where dreams come from
let it carry me away
where i will be reborn

the waters rise in my heart
the waters rise in my soul
the waters rise in my eyes

i am lost and i am found

the waters carry me
the waters carry me
the waters carry me

where my soul wants to go

the waters carry me
away.
***

* This poem was inspired by
Florence + The Machine – What The Water Gave Me.

This poem is for all the closest friends of my heart. I love you.

*****

don’t ask me to say good-bye

don’t ask me to say good-bye
 
we got into such trouble together, you & i
we snickered as we pulled a few pranks
we drank until thoroughly drunk, a time or two
we even howled at the moon,
when the full moon called for it
 
we rushed to share tidbits
about our latest crushes
we gossiped about
our most torrid love affairs
and then sometimes,
in the brutal aftermath
when the love ended
we cried because
we just needed to have a damn good cry
so we cried until we laughed
and then we laughed until we cried

we lurked in the same dingy discos
we acted on the same stage
we danced the same soft shoe

we pulled each other up
when we were most down
we flew over the moon
over our shared joys

you were ever a friend
you were always a pal
you were the moon of my delight

we lived and celebrated life together

don’t ask me to say good-bye, now
don’t ask me to say good-bye

i won’t say good-bye
i just won’t

i won’t say good-bye
because i love you
and it hurts too much
oh how it hurts so much
it just hurts too damn much
i just love you too damn much

i won’t say good-bye
because a piece of you
lives inside of me
in the deepest, deepest, deepest
most profound place
in my heart
the place
where the strongest love lives

a piece of you
will live there
in that special place
in my heart
forever

so i won’t say good-bye

i’ll say instead
so long
until we meet again
on the other side
of the light

so long, my friend
see you on the other side, dear heart

i love you.

***

for the soul seeker
that’s what the truth
of the soul
looks like
elegant lines
of thought
that yet
that still
make one pause
for one breathless moment
the moment
when time stills
as the heart fills
with the light, the knowledge

the oh!
the yes
moment
where tears rise
from the heart
because of
the joy of the universe
that fills it

clean bones
the root of it all
down to the bone
you go
when all the
body’s truths
stripped away
reveal the
shining soul beneath

oh deep
so deep
the clean bones

the simple truth
of man/woman
everything
one was meant to be
ever was
the *being*
in the now
the *being*
forever

follow me to
the clean bones
of my simple words
where together
we will find
the way.

***

sometimes
she smiles at me
and smoothes my hair back
like she did
when I was a child

sometimes
she’s cranky and critical
like she was
at times

sometimes
she’s just there
in the shadows
witnessing
one of my dream stories
passing

she’s there
she’s there
she’s there

and then i wake up
and realize
once again
she’s gone
and oh
my heart
is so full
with that.

***

i believe in you
i believe in
the possibilities of you

you and i
pieces of the same soul
in this life
or the next
we are meant to be

you understand me
i understand you
with every human frailty
with every tender gesture
with every sighing breath

rumi spoke of you
to all those
who hunger in the world
to glimpse that piece of heaven
in the reflection
of their own true self

and i believe
oh i believe
in your blessed belovedness
the sweetest homecoming
between two twinned souls

beloved
my beloved
i still believe
in the miracle
of you.

***

* See My Beloved

sometimes
you wink your cheeky wink
as you flash a bit of burlesque fishnet

sometimes
you cook up
a night of a thousand flavours
from a thousand resto bites

sometimes
you trip the light fantastic
with your many groovy mirror-balled halls

you’re eclectic and electric
changeable and cool

you rock it out with bells on at the Bell Centre
you roll with the most leisurely of Old Port strolls

you speak with the most fun franglais
with smiling ease
you art it up downtown and around
with a bright rainbow of stuff

Montréal, je t’aime
with a happy, happy
heart.

***

you overflow my heart
but this melancholy
tastes so sweet
it’s what happens
when you go
into the heart of darkness
and come back
up & out again

i savour it
i savour the feeling
the salty tears
the something something
riding my veins
the touch of my fingers
on my trembling lips

i treasure it
because it means i am alive
because it means i can feel
because it means i can taste
the grace of yet another day

sadness, my old friend
you are so familiar to me
you are a comfort
you are a reminder
of all my small victories

there is nothing to fear here
there is no shame and no blame

there is just me
and my overflowing heart
happy and sad
and just being
me
in this moment.

***